I'm sure you know as well as I that change is inevitable, it's continuous and it cannot be ignored. That being said, why is it so difficult for us to deal with it?
Well, this is certainly not a scientific answer, but I think we are such creatures of habit until we just hate disturbing the status quo. The vast majority of us do certain things a certain way all of the time. To suggest doing those things differently is to upset our apple cart, so to speak, and we resist it.
Maybe change wouldn't be so hard to deal with if we were to examine and adjust (change?) our view and attitude. Let me explain, change has the potential to bring some wonderful opportunities into our lives. For example, losing a job could result in someone going back to school and getting a degree.
So, here's one little tidbit of information to help you handle change more effectively: find a way to focus on the gift inherent in the change, rather than the negativity attached to it. Evaluate the change and determine how will it affect you. This will help to remove the emotionalism and replace it with rationalism.
Change happens, but it's up to us to see the potential otherwise we're sure to fall into the pothole!
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Monday, July 13, 2009
The Art of Self-Discipline
If you recall, I blogged a few months ago about small changes making a big difference. Well, I have to admit that I failed to follow my own advice after a while, and that same principle started to work adversely! My small change was a large Peanut Butter Avalanche every day from The Dairy Bar. In a matter of one month, I packed on a whopping 10 pounds! It certainly made a big difference! So that's what leads me to today's blog post -- self-discipline.
Self-discipline takes a made up mind. Speakers and trainers often refer to Benjamin Franklin and his famous 13 virtues he committed to work on all of his life. Key word committed. You may be familiar with his story, but here goes in case you're not. A young Franklin first pinpointed his weaknesses then he set out to strengthen them. His thinking was left unchecked his weaknesses would ultimately lead to a life of failure. How true!
Deciding the qualities most important to cultivate, he created a daily log and focused on a different virtue every week. His list: Temperance, Silence, Order, Resolution, Frugality, Industry, Sincerity, Justice, Moderation, Cleanliness, Tranquility, Chastity and Humility. Then he set out to work on that virtue, ultimately seeking to have a "check-free" record each week which signified his success at practicing that particular virtue. It's been said that Franklin is the father of self-improvement. He certainly set the tone for self-discipline.
What Ben Franklin teaches us is this:
Self-discipline takes a made up mind. Speakers and trainers often refer to Benjamin Franklin and his famous 13 virtues he committed to work on all of his life. Key word committed. You may be familiar with his story, but here goes in case you're not. A young Franklin first pinpointed his weaknesses then he set out to strengthen them. His thinking was left unchecked his weaknesses would ultimately lead to a life of failure. How true!
Deciding the qualities most important to cultivate, he created a daily log and focused on a different virtue every week. His list: Temperance, Silence, Order, Resolution, Frugality, Industry, Sincerity, Justice, Moderation, Cleanliness, Tranquility, Chastity and Humility. Then he set out to work on that virtue, ultimately seeking to have a "check-free" record each week which signified his success at practicing that particular virtue. It's been said that Franklin is the father of self-improvement. He certainly set the tone for self-discipline.
What Ben Franklin teaches us is this:
- We can change
- We have to stay focused on what we want to change
- Self-discipline is an art to be practiced, otherwise the habit of failure will kick in
Hey, I'm preaching to me today, friends! Are you up for the challenge of perfecting this art form? I am!
Until next post,
Dr. Angela aka "The Purpose Professor"
"Life with no purpose is no life at all!"
Sunday, July 12, 2009
The Power of Forgiveness
I preached a sermon once called, Forgiveness: From Scabs to Scars based on the very graphic illustration of picking at a wound and not allowing it to heal. When we leave it alone it scabs over and heals itself naturally, then the scab falls off leaving a scar. The scar says, "I got wounded, but I'm healed and it doesn't hurt anymore!" How many of us, though, keep picking at the wound refusing to let it heal?
The other side to that is choosing to forgive, to let something go and move on. Those of you who follow me on Twitter and Facebook know that I'm shouting from the rooftop about my uncle, Ronald Cotton and his new book, Picking Cotton. You also know that Uncle Ron was positively identifed as a rapist. He spent 11 years in the NC prison system before DNA helped to free him.
What impresses me most about my uncle is his ability to forgive. He could have been a bitter man, and hated Jennifer Thompson-Cannino (the woman who accused him). Think about it. Because of her positive I.D. and eye-witness testimony he spent 11 years in jail. Instead, he forgave her. He let the wound turn into a scab so that it could turn into a scar. His forgiveness has been so powerful it has perpelled them into a world neither of them ever thought they would be in, i.e., motivational speakers, best-selling authors, and friends.
Who do you need to forgive? Yeah, I know it hurt. Yeah, I know you can't believe they would do something like that to you -- but they did -- they wounded you. But will you keep picking at it or will you let it scab over so that it can become a scar ... a badge of honor, if you will, that says, "Hey, World! I got hurt, but I got over it!"
Until next post,
Dr. Angela aka "The Purpose Professor"
"Life with no purpose is no life at all"
The other side to that is choosing to forgive, to let something go and move on. Those of you who follow me on Twitter and Facebook know that I'm shouting from the rooftop about my uncle, Ronald Cotton and his new book, Picking Cotton. You also know that Uncle Ron was positively identifed as a rapist. He spent 11 years in the NC prison system before DNA helped to free him.
What impresses me most about my uncle is his ability to forgive. He could have been a bitter man, and hated Jennifer Thompson-Cannino (the woman who accused him). Think about it. Because of her positive I.D. and eye-witness testimony he spent 11 years in jail. Instead, he forgave her. He let the wound turn into a scab so that it could turn into a scar. His forgiveness has been so powerful it has perpelled them into a world neither of them ever thought they would be in, i.e., motivational speakers, best-selling authors, and friends.
Who do you need to forgive? Yeah, I know it hurt. Yeah, I know you can't believe they would do something like that to you -- but they did -- they wounded you. But will you keep picking at it or will you let it scab over so that it can become a scar ... a badge of honor, if you will, that says, "Hey, World! I got hurt, but I got over it!"
Until next post,
Dr. Angela aka "The Purpose Professor"
"Life with no purpose is no life at all"
Friday, July 10, 2009
Plug In Your G.P.S.!
As many of you know, I travel a great deal. I would be lost (literally) without my handy Garmin Nuvi. Whenever I'm in a state and city I know very little about, I just put in an address and within a matter of seconds Nuvi begins to direct to my destination. How cool!
Well, what about life's destinations, otherwise known as goals? Where do you want to go in your life? How will you get there? I'm a big Brian Tracy fan and in his program, The Psychology of Achievement, he says that "less than 3 percent of Americans have written goals, and less than 1 percent review and rewrite their goals on a daily basis." In other words, 97-98 percent of us (if you're American) have no clue as to where we're going. We're just going -- moving along in life without a real destination. Then we find ourselves in the "coulda, shoulda, woulda" mindset looking back over a life partially lived. Oh, we might grow older but in many ways without goals we're stuck. How sad.
So, my friends, here's some inspiration for you today: plug up your G.P.S., your Goal Pointing System. Sit down and decide where you'd like to go in your life. What would you like to accomplish? Write it down. Review it. Revise it. And watch your life change!
Until next blog,
"Life with no purpose is no life at all!"
Dr. Angela aka "The Purpose Professor"
Well, what about life's destinations, otherwise known as goals? Where do you want to go in your life? How will you get there? I'm a big Brian Tracy fan and in his program, The Psychology of Achievement, he says that "less than 3 percent of Americans have written goals, and less than 1 percent review and rewrite their goals on a daily basis." In other words, 97-98 percent of us (if you're American) have no clue as to where we're going. We're just going -- moving along in life without a real destination. Then we find ourselves in the "coulda, shoulda, woulda" mindset looking back over a life partially lived. Oh, we might grow older but in many ways without goals we're stuck. How sad.
So, my friends, here's some inspiration for you today: plug up your G.P.S., your Goal Pointing System. Sit down and decide where you'd like to go in your life. What would you like to accomplish? Write it down. Review it. Revise it. And watch your life change!
Until next blog,
"Life with no purpose is no life at all!"
Dr. Angela aka "The Purpose Professor"
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
How do YOU define success?
I know a few successful people ... or do I? Well, I think it all depends on your definition of success. Was Steve McNair successful? Michael Jackson? What about Sara Palin? President Barack Obama? What about you?
Does the size of your bank account and the cars parked in your garage measure your success? I think those kinds of things are the trappings, but true success comes from within -- who are you really when the world is not looking.
The question stems from a conversation I had with one of my sons. He reminded me that when they were little, I made sure that they knew their grandparents and great grandparents. Even though I was a single mom living in Texas, every year they spent time with both sides of their family. He put success in perspective when he said, "Mom, you gave us such a gift ... the gift of knowing our grandparents."
It made me think about success and what it really means to me, and it's this:
"Living every day without regret and taking every opportunity to make real connections -- connections with family, connections with friends, and even connections with strangers. Success is lying down at night, grateful for the chance to live, learn, and love just because."
And yes, Michael Jackson was successful -- Paris proved that to the world yesterday!
What say ye?
Until next post,
"Life with no purpose is no life at all!"
Dr. Angela
Does the size of your bank account and the cars parked in your garage measure your success? I think those kinds of things are the trappings, but true success comes from within -- who are you really when the world is not looking.
The question stems from a conversation I had with one of my sons. He reminded me that when they were little, I made sure that they knew their grandparents and great grandparents. Even though I was a single mom living in Texas, every year they spent time with both sides of their family. He put success in perspective when he said, "Mom, you gave us such a gift ... the gift of knowing our grandparents."
It made me think about success and what it really means to me, and it's this:
"Living every day without regret and taking every opportunity to make real connections -- connections with family, connections with friends, and even connections with strangers. Success is lying down at night, grateful for the chance to live, learn, and love just because."
And yes, Michael Jackson was successful -- Paris proved that to the world yesterday!
What say ye?
Until next post,
"Life with no purpose is no life at all!"
Dr. Angela
Monday, July 6, 2009
The Attractor Factor
I just finished reading Joe Vitale's The Attractor Factor and I can't say enough good things about it. Talk about "life-altering"!
Here's a little tip I want to pass on to you from Joe's book... Get clear of old events, hurts, memories and beliefs (p. 155). Joes says that getting clear gives you more energy to attract what you really want out of life. Now, let me tell you how this one concept helped me.
For a while I've struggled with money, i.e., not having enough of it! Last year was ... well ... I don't even want to go there. Anyway, Joe suggested that I write down how I felt things were. He suggested using all my emotion and describing the pain, the hurts, all of the "stuff". When I did this, I started crying and really began to feel all of that negativity. Then, on Joe's suggestion, I wrote how I wanted things to be. It was descriptive and I made it real. I could see my checking account deposits. I imagined eating out and leaving a huge tip because I have more than enough. After I finished, I went outside and took the first one, set it on fire, and watched it burned. WOW! This exercise was so liberating!
From that day (about two weeks ago), I noticed my entire attitude had changed. I am happier in my seminars. I am drawing positive, upbeat, and enlightened people to me. And .... drum roll, please--money is coming to me like never before. For example, I checked my account and found out that I had made an unexpected $600 in commissions from a job.
Joe's book will help you become deliberate about your own personal development. Run, don't walk, get a copy today and change your life!
Until next blog,
"Life with no purpose is no life at all!"
Dr. Angela aka "The Purpose Professor"
Here's a little tip I want to pass on to you from Joe's book... Get clear of old events, hurts, memories and beliefs (p. 155). Joes says that getting clear gives you more energy to attract what you really want out of life. Now, let me tell you how this one concept helped me.
For a while I've struggled with money, i.e., not having enough of it! Last year was ... well ... I don't even want to go there. Anyway, Joe suggested that I write down how I felt things were. He suggested using all my emotion and describing the pain, the hurts, all of the "stuff". When I did this, I started crying and really began to feel all of that negativity. Then, on Joe's suggestion, I wrote how I wanted things to be. It was descriptive and I made it real. I could see my checking account deposits. I imagined eating out and leaving a huge tip because I have more than enough. After I finished, I went outside and took the first one, set it on fire, and watched it burned. WOW! This exercise was so liberating!
From that day (about two weeks ago), I noticed my entire attitude had changed. I am happier in my seminars. I am drawing positive, upbeat, and enlightened people to me. And .... drum roll, please--money is coming to me like never before. For example, I checked my account and found out that I had made an unexpected $600 in commissions from a job.
Joe's book will help you become deliberate about your own personal development. Run, don't walk, get a copy today and change your life!
Until next blog,
"Life with no purpose is no life at all!"
Dr. Angela aka "The Purpose Professor"
Monday, June 8, 2009
The Challenge of Delegation
General George S. Patton once said, "Don't tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and let them surprise you with the results." For most of us, however, our mantra is: "If I want it done right, I have to do it myself!" Right? Wrong!
Here's a quick tip I picked up from a little book called Managing People - Secrets to Leading for New Managers. When you delegate, give instructions not orders. Instructions silently say to the person you've giving them to, "Hey, I believe that you're capable of participating, learning, and doing. I also want you to have a say in how things are done." Orders on the other hand also send a silent message, and it goes something like this: "There's only one way to do this, and it's my way! Your independent thinking is neither needed nor will it be accepted."
Wow! What a difference, right? This is the point, as the delegator we should focus on results -- getting the project done. Think of all the benefits of adopting this delegation technique:
Here's a quick tip I picked up from a little book called Managing People - Secrets to Leading for New Managers. When you delegate, give instructions not orders. Instructions silently say to the person you've giving them to, "Hey, I believe that you're capable of participating, learning, and doing. I also want you to have a say in how things are done." Orders on the other hand also send a silent message, and it goes something like this: "There's only one way to do this, and it's my way! Your independent thinking is neither needed nor will it be accepted."
Wow! What a difference, right? This is the point, as the delegator we should focus on results -- getting the project done. Think of all the benefits of adopting this delegation technique:
- Thanks to you, the delegatee becomes more capable of doing more
- You and your delegatee experience higher rates of productivity
- You gain the time and freedom to focus on more pressing activities
Looks like a win-win for everyone!
Until next post remember, "Life with no purpose is no life at all!"
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